If I’m a loser, then darling I’m lost. No I’m not lost at sea, torrential downpours do not keep me from finding that terra firma I’ve been searching for. I’m not lost in a wonderous forest of trees, incapable of recognizing one tree from another. Nor am I lost on a mountain with nobody to find me, cold and alone hoping someone finds me. And I’m not lost in some shopping mall, crying out of fear and too scared to really ask anyone for help or guidance that I might find my way to a love one. It’s not your average type of lost, I know where the road is taking me…
Intrigued by you darling I dug deeply into you, I got lost in a sea of sentiments yet I was still on terra firma somehow yet it didn’t feel that way. I’m lost yet I know exactly where I am and it’s exactly where I want to be. I’m lost in a place where I have some company, where I feel all the warmth and affection in the world just from one place. I’ve cried a few times but not about needing to go but wanting to stay, I’m not scared of it. I couldn’t have picked a better place to get lost in, because if I’m a loser it’s only because I’m losing to you and I’m losing altitude with you. By trying to make you fall in love with me, I fell into you and I’ve been falling ever since. And there’s no need to worry if we hit land, cause I’ll be your terra firma if you’re mine….
Pompeius Magnus (Pompey the Great, Roman General), 106 BC - 48 BC (via wearechanginglanes)
Stephen King, Storm of the Century (1999)
Paulo Coelho (via indictus)
You will not remember much from school.
School is designed to teach you how to respond and listen to authority figures in the event of an emergency. Like if there’s a bomb in a mall or a fire in an office. It can, apparently, take you more than a decade to learn this. These are not the best days of your life. They are still ahead of you. You will fall in love and have your heart broken in many different, new and interesting ways in college or university (if you go) and you will actually learn things, as at this point, people will believe you have a good chance of obeying authority and surviving, in the event of an emergency. If, in your chosen career path, there are award shows that give out more than ten awards in one night or you have to pay someone to actually take the award home to put on your mantlepiece, then those awards are more than likely designed to make young people in their 20’s work very late, for free, for other people. Those people will do their best to convince you that they have value. They don’t. Only the things you do have real, lasting value, not the things you get for the things you do. You will, at some point, realise that no trophy loves you as much as you love it, that it cannot pay your bills (even if it increases your salary slightly) and that it won’t hold your hand tightly as you say your last words on your deathbed. Only people who love you can do that. If you make art to feel better, make sure it eventually makes you feel better. If it doesn’t, stop making it. You will love someone differently, as time passes. If you always expect to feel the same kind of love you felt when you first met someone, you will always be looking for new people to love. Love doesn’t fade. It just changes as it grows. It would be boring if it didn’t. There is no truly “right” way of writing, painting, being or thinking, only things which have happened before. People who tell you differently are assholes, petrified of change, who should be violently ignored. No philosophy, mantra or piece of advice will hold true for every conceivable situation. “The early bird catches the worm” does not apply to minefields. Perfection only exists in poetry and movies, everyone fights occasionally and no sane person is ever completely sure of anything. Nothing is wrong with any of this. Wisdom does not come from age, wisdom comes from doing things. Be very, very careful of people who call themselves wise, artists, poets or gurus. If you eat well, exercise often and drink enough water, you have a good chance of living a long and happy life. The only time you can really be happy, is right now. There is no other moment that exists that is more important than this one. Do not sacrifice this moment in the hopes of a better one. It is easy to remember all these things when they are being said, it is much harder to remember them when you are stuck in traffic or lying in bed worrying about the next day. If you want to move people, simply tell them the truth. Today, it is rarer than it’s ever been.
(People will write things like this on posters (some of the words will be bigger than others) or speak them softly over music as art (pause for effect). The reason this happens is because as a society, we need to self-medicate against apathy and the slow, gradual death that can happen to anyone, should they confuse life with actually living.)
- Misato: If you take that into consideration, then perhaps this world isn't that bad.
- Shinji: Still, the reality itself might not be bad, but I could still hate myself.
- Hyuga: : But it's your mind which takes reality and separates it into what's bad and hateful.
- Aoba: It's only the mind which separates reality from truth.
- Maya: Any new position from which you view your reality will change your perception of its nature. It's all literally a matter of perspective.
- Kaji: There are as many truths as there are people.
- Kensuke: But there is only one truth that is your truth. That's the one that's formed by whatever point of view that you chose to view it from. It's a revised perception that protects you.
- Toji: That's true. And one can have a perspective that's far too small.
- Hikari: However, a person can only see things from the perspective that they chose to see them from.
- Asuka: One must learn to judge things via the perceived truths that one receives from others.
- Misato: For example, sunny days make you feel good.
- Rei: Rainy days make you feel gloomy.
- Asuka: If you are told this is so, then that is what you believe is so.
- Ritsuko: But you can have fun on a rainy day as well!
- Fuyutsuki: Your truth can be changed simply by the way you accept it. That's how fragile the truth for a human is.
- Kaji: A person's truth is so simple, that most ignore it to concentrate on what they think are deeper truths.
- Gendo: You, for example, are simply unused to what it is to be liked by others.
- Misato: You've never learned how to deal with fearing what others feel about you and so you avoid it.
- Shinji: But, don't the others hate me?
- Asuka: What are you, stupid? Haven't you realized it's all in your imagination, you megadork!
- Shinji: But, I hate myself.
- Rei: One who truly hates himself cannot love, he cannot place his trust in another.
- Shinji: I'm a coward. I'm cowardly, sneaky and weak.
- Misato: No, only if you think you are, but if you know yourself, you can take care of yourself.
- Shinji: [introspectively] I hate myself. But, maybe, maybe I could love myself. Maybe, my life can have a greater value. That's right!. I am no more or less than myself. I am me! I want to be myself! I want to continue existing in this world! My life is worth living here!
- [Shinji's room cracks open and he finds himself on a small blue globe with the cast of the series]
- Everyone: [applauding] Congratulations!
- Shinji: Thank you all!
F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby (via magicpuffs)
Nick Joaquin, The Woman Who Had Two Navels (via bookmania)
David Bowie (via badasschris)
Franz Kafka (via theoldludwigvan)